Transcript, Fairhaven Guard Corps.

Interview, Mr. Cael Noone, in relation to investigations ongoing.
Interview conducted by Guardsman Kyler.
Transcript begins.



Kyler: Do take a seat Mr...?

Noone: Cael will be fine, officer.

Kyler: Ah, well, it's for our records you see. I'm afraid I must insist.

Noone: Oh yes, silly of me. Cael Noone, with an 'e'.

Kyler: Hmmm. Cael? Not a common name outside of the Fey. You don't look Elven.

Noone: *Laugh* Indeed not.

Kyler: May I ask why that amuses you?

Noone: Oh, it's just something my father used to say. He was an Elf, a Bard of some renown, and one day a rival entertainer tricked him into stepping through a portal. He ended up on a world without any magical knowledge, filled with just humans. He plied his trade for many years, becoming amazingly famous, he said. He met my mother, a young human woman, and they married in secret. When she fell pregnant with me, he decided he wanted me born in his home, and he worked for months on a portal to come back. He succeeded the day I was born. So, I'm a half-elf, but growing up, my father always used to say I 'looked a little Elvish, uh-huh-huh'. I never understood why, but you just reminded me of it.

Kyler: Okay, then. Mr. Noone. You know why we've asked to speak with you, I take it?

Noone: Something silly about my trinkets, I believe? I will admit, they weren't very forthcoming when they were putting the manacles on.

Kyler: I would hardly call daggers like that 'trinkets', Mr Noone. They're practically Short Swords! And Guardsman Wallis has some Arcane talent, he reckons they're magically inclined, too! And Billy Wallace ain't never been wrong yet. *Cough* Sorry. Lost my thread for a second. Yes, Mr. Noone, it's about your 'Trinkets'. May I ask how you acquired them?

Noone: Well, the parrying dagger is a family heirloom. The Orphanage gave it to me on my 16th birthday. They tell me it belong to my father. I wouldn't know, I never met the man. But I keep it out of...

Kyler: You never met the man? But you just said he used to call you 'Elvish'.

Noone: I'm sorry Officer, but I think you might have me confused with someone else. I never knew either of my parents. I was told by the Orphange that my father took me there as a baby in the middle of the night, bleeding and wounded. He told them to take care of me, and to give me the dagger when I came of age. He died of his wounds right there in the doorway. That silly dagger is all I have to connect me to him.

Kyler: *...*

Kyler: Very well. The other dagger? How did you acquire that?

Noone: I stole it.

Kyler: WHAT?

Noone: No, I'm kidding. Really? You thought I was serious? Dear me, Officer. You really should lighten up a little.

Kyler: I'd love to 'lighten up', but in the last 3 weeks we've had more thefts in the city than in the last year combined. How long have you been here? 3 weeks, you said when first questioned? And in that time, amongst other things, the armoury at the Wizards Guild was stolen from, including the loss of quite a number of magical daggers.

Noone: It does seem like you have your plate full, Officer. It occurs to me, though. Surely the wizards had some sort of magical security? Something better than most laymen could acquire. And that failed to deter the thief? I'd be concerned that someone who could bypass magical security of that level could get ANYWHERE. Anyway, was there anything else, Officer? I really must be going. I have some supplies I need to pick up, and it's getting dark out. I'm assuming you don't have anything you can charge me with? Maybe 'not being local when a crime was commited?

Kyler: No, we don't have anything to charge you with. But do mind: I WILL be keeping an eye on you.

Noone: I'm sure I shall try to return the favour. Do tell your wife she looks better in the blue hat, not the yellow one, won't you? Goodbye, Michael.

Kyler: *Expletive Deleted*

Transcript ends.